10:17 p.m. - 2001-03-26
friends...and such
Ok. I'm going to do another message to people thing....only more people , and maybe some more meaningful messages.......this will take a while I think.
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Aaron- Ok. Like I said before. You are like my best friend. But where are you? When we are together we click as friends but there is always this thing that just makes us kind of weird. Maybe because im like your replacement for Drew...But whatever it is, I hope we can fix it before you leave, whenever that is, because your mean a lot to me and I dont want us to be like this forever.
Alchohol- You suck. Go to hell.
Alissa- Thanks so much for caring. And knowing I care. Its nice to just do that for eachother :)
Angie- Thank you so much for asking me to prom, it means a LOT to me...you asked at a really good time too because I was having a bad day and you made it good! You are a way awesome person and I hope we can get to know eachother better and stuff!
Brandy- Yeah.....Whats up? I wish you would tell me. If you are pissed at me, say something. If you dont like me, say something. If you are like scared of me, say something. If you just dont want to talk to me, say something! Just say something?
Charlie- I'm sorry for how I treated you. I really wish I hadnt ignored you for all that time. It pisses me off that I did that, but you just scared me. I didnt know how to deal with someone who had worse problems than me. But I will listen if you need now.....I'm sorry.
Chris- I still think your a jerk for what youve done and what you said, but i'm sorry for saying the crap I said to you. I should have toned it down a bit and just said what needed to be said. I went too far, but you went somewhere that was idiotic. So yeah. And no. I am not gay, not that its any business of yours.
DJ- I love you man. You are seriously one of the most disgustingly unique people out there, and you should embrace that. Dont ever let anything anyone says, especially me, change that in you! If you want to let one rip in a Chinese place. DO IT! (Just dont let me know, hehe) Run your ass off and be as crazy of a bastard you can be. You dont have much time left to be crazy. So get it out now! :)
Emily- This is a hard one to write because I really dont know what to say...but your name popped up really fast when I thought of people to write to. Just like.....thank you for listening to me, and not hating me anymore. You are a really cool person and I hope you find someone awesome.
Esther- I love you a lot. I know you dont read this, but I just want everyone to know I love you! heheh. And just for a reference, this is a friendly love :) I am sorry things were screwy before, but everything was weird. I am sorry for everything. I hope things are ok again.....
God- (I am sorry for anyone who has problems with this, but well....I just dont care.) I really miss having something with you. Things have been weird lately and I havent talked to you much and I havent done anything about that either. I want to be a Young Life leader and help other kids, but I have trouble accepting religion as a part of my life. Just help me out with that?
Katy- You are an incredible person. I really want us to be better friends, not that I dont consider you a good friend now, it's just like yeah. I dont want us to be friends because of DJ and whatnot. Because thats just stupid. Just remember, you are having my kittens!
Megan- I care about you a lot. It hurts me so much to hear that you think noone cares about you. Even if NO ONE else does, I DO! And other people do care. Sometimes you just need to accept things and not fight them. It works easier that way. If you EVER EVER EVER EVER need to talk, you can call me! ANY TIME.
Winter- I hate you. heheheh j/k :) You are way awesome. Being friends with you is cool because, as weird as this sounds, I see alot of myself in you. I mean, its not like physical, cuz yoru a girl and stuff, but like....the things you like, and the ways you express yourself. I just think there is this weird connection in my mind. Dont be scared though, im not ACTUALLY going to chop you into little bits ;)
Everyone- Thank you so much for just being there. Everything. JUST EVERYTHING. You do and say to me helps so much. Even if its just something little, it helps. I care so much for all of you and I wish I could be there all the time for everyone. I wish I could just hold all of you and never let go. But sadly, thats a physical impossibility (unless of course I am elastic man, which I dont think I am) You are just all so awesome. Your strengths, your weaknesses, everything. It what makes us who we are. And what we all are is great. Even Hitler.....well, maybe not Hitler, but you guys anyway :)
Well, I think thats about it. I'm going to do this every now and then. I really like it.....even if half of the people will never read them. I just need to say these things somehow. Peace outie everyone :) I'm going to bed now.....ciao.......
